


A Little Too Not Over You

by jay_girl88



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Don't copy to another site, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, Jealous Steve Rogers, Jealousy, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining Steve Rogers, Possessive Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-07-08 00:44:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19860760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jay_girl88/pseuds/jay_girl88
Summary: "Steve had experienced torture before. This was a cruel and unusual form of it."Sometimes, you can't see what's right in front of you until it isn't there anymore.~::~::~::~Based on a prompt in the SteveTony discord server:Steve had thought of Tony as a friend. Actually, one of the best friends he's made in the future. Then he hears Tony telling someone that "it's okay, he's over Steve, that's ancient history now" and suddenly his worldview is flipped. Tony had been into him, maybe in love with him, and he hadn't noticed? But everything's okay, because they can still keep being friends as they had been.Somehow, this doesn't make him feel better.





	A Little Too Not Over You

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, thank you to the OP for the beautiful prompt! I hope I did it justice, and that you enjoy it! !<3
> 
> Secondly, this is unapologetic fluff, with copious amounts of adorable and pining Steve. I have no regrets, except maybe that it's done now. I hope y'all enjoy it!

“I shoulda just pretended that I was still a murderous assassin.” 

Steve rolled his eyes as Bucky groaned into his pillow, feigning exasperation but still managing to be really pleased that his best friend was reaching a point in his recovery where he could joke around about what had happened to him. “Nearly a whole century, and you’re still not even sorta funny,” he shot back easily, folding his legs underneath himself and making himself comfortable at the foot of Bucky’s bed.

“No, hear me out,” Barnes grumbled, but dragged himself upright anyway. “You think Nat has to deal with her moronic friends shaking her awake at three am in the fuckin’ mornin’? No way.”

He had a point there. A person would have to be certifiable to waltz into the Black Widow’s bedroom in the middle of the night and alternately shake and urge her awake. “This is important,” Steve said instead of arguing, brow furrowing as he remembered the reason he’d woken Bucky up in the first place; a reason that was still making his stomach churn. “I was going to the workshop to sketch because I couldn’t sleep, and I knew Tony would be up, too, and I heard him talkin’ to someon-…”

“What’d your ma tell ya about eavesdroppin’?” Bucky demanded, eyes reproachful as he cut in. It made Steve feel like a kid again, as the instigator of most of the trouble him and Buck got into, contrary to popular opinion. “And what are ya doin’, skulking around insteada just counting sheep or somethin’ like a normal person? I know the serum helps and all, but ya still gotta get a solid six, Stevie, it may not seem like...”

The blond patiently waited for the reprimand to see its natural conclusion, switching off because there was simply no chance that he was going to heed whatever Bucky was telling him. These sleepless nights with Tony was one of the best parts of this century, as weird as it might have sounded, and Steve wasn’t about to give them up for something as banal as sleep. Besides, he napped sometimes, didn’t he? That was good enough. 

When he felt like Bucky was done, or as close to it as Steve was going to get, he heedlessly continued his story. “He was talking to Rhodes, I think, remember him?” Bucky only grunted resignedly in response, and Steve took it as acknowledgement. “Anyway, he was telling Rhodes that he… well, that he was over me.” Now, his voice took on a tone that was plainly confused, because Steve could honestly say that he was just that. “I don’t… I mean, when was he under me?” the blond asked bewilderedly, brow knitting together as he thought it through for what felt like the thousandth time. 

At the very least, the words had woken Bucky up, and his best friend was now eyeing him speculatively. 

“Tony was carryin’ a torch for ya,” he nodded, as if it were the easiest thing in the world. Before Steve could ask him why, Bucky kept on talking. “Are you into him?”

The denial came swift and easy to his lips, but before Steve could give it a voice, it just… died there. The words wouldn’t come. Couldn’t come, because honestly… “I never thought about it,” he admitted softly, sounding troubled as he fixed his gaze on a spot on the bedspread. “I don’t think I am, but I just never… I didn’t even realize he had feelings like that for me,” he eventually managed to get out. 

“Steve Rogers, not noticin’ love. Big shocker there.”

He snapped his face up to glare at Bucky. “How was I supposed to notice?” he challenged, sounding more sulky than argumentative. “He’s my best friend, just as much as you are.”

Bucky looked like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself. “What else did he say?”

“Nothin’ much,” Steve shrugged, still feeling inexplicably like he’d been sucker punched. “Jus’ that he was tired of waiting around for nothin’, and he was happy that we were best friends so he wasn’t going to ruin that for anythin’. That he wouldn’t have to, now, because he’s _over me_.” The words made him frown reflexively, stomach rolling once more.

Bucky had that look again, like he was about to say something, but he still didn’t follow through. “Well that’s good then, right?” he asked slowly, almost cautiously. “Because if you’re not into him, and he’s over you, then… everythin’ can just be business as normal?”

In theory, it made sense, but for some bizarre reason, the notion didn’t make him as happy as he thought it should have. Wasn’t it supposed to be a relief? That Steve wouldn’t have to confront anything awkward like feelings with Tony, and wouldn’t have to risk losing the best thing he’d had after coming out of the ice? 

A relief. Of course. 

“It’s great,” he nodded, trying to muster up his usual level of conviction and failing dismally. “Yeah, it’s a good thing. We can just keep goin’ as we were.” 

Bucky nodded; was already reclining back against his pillows. “Hey, since you’re not into him, mind if I make a move?” he asked casually, and the flare of heat and temper in Steve’s gut was both unexpected and irrational. “Tony’s great,” the brunet continued, seemingly totally unaware of the ugly feeling bubbling in Steve’s chest. “Smart, kind, funny… not to mention he’s fuckin’ gorgeous.”

“Bein’ brainwashed ain’t a good enough reason for actin’ like you’re braindead, jerk.” Steve tried to force his voice into something light and nonchalant. Bucky wouldn’t let him forget it if he saw Steve being protective of Tony, never mind that it was totally friendly. “You and Tony finally hit your stride as friends, don’t go complicating that now.”

“Some of us, Stevie, ain’t afraid of a little complicatin’,” Bucky replied loftily, sounding strangely amused. “But alright, fine. I won’t go sweepin’ him off his feet. Now get the fuck outta my room and let me sleep. Punk.”

###

Steve could admit, in the relative comfort of his own mind, that eavesdropping on Tony’s conversation with Rhodes had probably been wrong of him. Okay, it had definitely been wrong of him, but in his defense, it hadn’t been his intention; all he’d wanted to do was join one of his best friends for another one of their sleepless nights made easier and better for each other’s company. Nightmares plagued both of them on a more than frequent basis and after a while, it had become second nature for one of them to seek out the other when the images in their heads got too bad to handle alone. It had been a natural progression to go from helping each other out to becoming best friends, and an equally natural progression for those nights to go from necessary to voluntary. And why wouldn’t it have? Not only was Tony fascinating company, but being the sole focus of his attention was also a heady thing, not least of all because the man himself was so vastly different when they were alone, as opposed to when they were in public. 

When they were alone, Tony was calm and open and relaxed. He grinned with a youthful exuberance that he claimed was out of place in the public eye; he became a simple mechanic instead of a billionaire businessman. He laughed with his whole body when he found something funny and he was perfectly happy splitting a pizza while in his grease-stained wifebeater and sweats. Most of all, he never skimped on the attention that he afforded Steve on those nights; he listened to everything Steve said and responded only after due consideration and care of the words, it didn’t matter whether they were discussing battle strategies or whether Steve enjoyed donuts over waffles. He treated Steve like he was the most important thing to him in that moment, and never hesitated to turn away from whatever, likely important, work he was busy with just because Steve needed him to. 

On anyone else, the super soldier might have thought that Tony had only been doing those things out of apparent feelings for him, but perhaps the worst thing about it was that Tony continued to do so after his conversation with Rhodes. After he was apparently “over Steve”. He was just that kind of person and just that kind of friend; and the blond had absolutely no clue why that was irking him. 

“Alright, Rogersaurus.” Tony swiveled around in his chair after Steve’s third moody grunt as a response to whatever he was talking about. Brown eyes narrowed slightly as they considered him. “What’s going on with you?” he demanded, not quite managing to sound pissed when the concern was so blatant in his eyes. “I’ve been yakking for half an hour about the merits of artificial intelligence in medical advancement and you have yet to stop me. What happened? Barton change the settings on your phone to Chinese again? Did Thor eat all the poptarts?”

Steve felt guilt wash over him when he realized how broody he’d been throughout their whole conversation. It wasn’t Tony’s fault that he’d eavesdropped and it definitely wasn’t fair to punish him for something that Steve wasn’t even meant to know. Although why he wasn’t meant to know was anyone’s guess… why hadn’t Tony just come to him and admitted his feelings?

That was what was bothering him, Steve was sure of it. The fact that there’d, at some point, been a secret between them. 

But it was done with, now, and there was no point being upset over it. “Nothin’,” he shook his head, and tried at the same time to shake off his mood. He tried for a smile, and was happy that it came easier than he thought it would. “You know what we should do?”

“What’s that?” Tony asked, a bemused grin lifting his lips in response. The sight made Steve’s own smile easier still, and a lot more natural. 

“Go for ice-cream,” the blond declared, standing up. Speaking the idea only strengthened his belief that it was a great one. “Let’s go for ice-cream. Chocolate ice-cream. With sprinkles.”

Tony laughed, and where his eyes had been dimmed with badly concealed worry, they were now sparkling in delight. “It’s almost 3am,” he pointed out in amusement, even as he stood and threw his pencil on the desk, where a half-finished design lay abandoned. Almost immediately, DUM-E rolled to him with a series of happy whirs, making Tony roll his eyes affectionately before reaching out to pat the bot placatingly. “Where are we gonna find chocolate ice-cream with sprinkles?” 

“That’s your job,” Steve replied cheekily, feeling his spirits rise by the second. Not with the promise of ice-cream, but with the simple pleasure of spending time with Tony. Because maybe he was over Steve, but Tony was still his, really. His best friend, he meant. Of course.

Adopting a mock innocent expression, Tony asked, “Aren’t you the man with the plan, though? Star-spangled and all? I think I’ve even got the tapes somewhere around here to prove it…”

“You’re a pain in my ass,” Steve replied, but he was chuckling as he spoke, a fond expression leveled at the smirking genius. “Just grab a jacket and let’s get a move on, huh?”

“Yes Sir,” Tony saluted playfully, and a bolt of something hot and uncomfortable rippled down Steve’s spine. It displaced him, but thankfully Tony was oblivious to it as he pulled on an old MIT hoodie that Steve was eighty percent sure belonged to Rhodes. 

He’d never had much of a military kink before, so why was his stomach curling in a very familiar way?

Dismissing it uneasily, he followed Tony out of the lab, allowing the brunet’s incessant chatter to sooth his mind and his confusing feelings. The walk outside had definitely been a good idea; the crisp nighttime air combined with great company and peace in the city that he loved made for an effective distraction from what had knocked him all the way off-kilter since hearing that Tony had had feelings for him. 

As if reading his mind, Tony murmured, “New York is amazing at night. It helps that even the delinquents are asleep by now,” he added jokingly, slanting a grin at Steve when he laughed, “but it really is amazing.”

“Yeah,” the blond agreed softly, simple happiness lingering with the contentment he was always filled with whenever he was with Tony. “I never really got to appreciate it before now.” 

He’d gone out before, sure, but… this was different. He was with Tony, in that moment, and appreciation for the little things came easy when he was around the inventor. Right now, for instance. He was grateful for New York; he was grateful for chocolate ice-cream and sprinkles. He was grateful for summer breezes and quiet streets and sleepless nights that belonged to nothing and nobody but him and his best friend. 

He was grateful for Tony. 

Tony, who saw the world, and Steve, in a way that no one else ever did. Tony, who treated his bots like they were his children and kept dumb tapes of Steve’s USO days to make him laugh and abandoned everything at 3 in the morning because Steve wanted to get ice-cream. 

He was special. So special, and so incredibly unlike anyone that the super soldier had ever known before. He’d always known as much; of course he had; but when was the last time that Steve had expressed any of that appreciation? Was that why Tony was _over him_? Because Steve didn’t tell him enough, just how much he meant to him?

And why did that even matter? Steve didn’t want to take the risk of hurting Tony more than he already inadvertently had, so it was a good thing that the door had closed on anything romantic between them. 

Right? 

But then, why didn’t it feel good? 

Steve was wrenched from his thoughts with Tony’s gentle hand around the cusp of his shoulder. He stopped obligingly in place, raising turbulent blue eyes to meet soft brown ones that looked almost amber thanks to the glint coming from an overhead streetlamp. For a single moment, time stopped, and he couldn’t have looked away from Tony if the fate of the world had depended on it. 

Then, the brunet sighed soundlessly, and the spell was broken. 

“What’s wrong, Steve?” he asked, achingly soft. The use of his first name simultaneously sobered and thrilled him; the former because of how rarely Tony used it, and the latter because, well… Tony _so rarely used it_. But damn if each syllable didn’t form perfectly around the inventor’s lips. “Come on, talk to me. I’m worried.”

Tony was someone who seldom expressed his emotions, especially so freely, and in that moment, Steve realized what a priceless gift he’d almost never known he had. Tony’s love was a force entirely its own, stronger than any current and more addictive than any opiate. And it was his. Or, had been his… 

No. It was still his. It had to be, because… 

“Have you ever been in love?” The words slipped from his lips without his permission, and if Steve had been any less focused and determined to retrieve what was rightfully his, he might have been mortified for speaking them so boldly. 

Tony seemed taken aback enough for them both, but no one had ever accused the man of getting flustered under pressure. “Yes,” he answered matter-of-factly after a brief second. Though the answer was delivered almost carelessly, it didn’t escape Steve’s notice that the brunet tensed slightly. “Is that what this is about? You’re… are you…?”

“How did you know? That you were in love?” he asked instead of answering, blatantly ignoring Tony’s question. His companion bristled, although not overtly, and shifted his gaze back to the streets ahead of them while they walked.

The silence was longer this time, and just when Steve thought that he wouldn’t get an answer, Tony spoke. “Things that were good became great, and things that were bad didn’t seem so terrible anymore.” His voice was sharp, almost curt, but at least Tony was speaking, and Steve wisely kept quiet in the hopes of hearing more. “Making them smile became more important to me than any project I’ve ever taken on, and the sound of their laugh made just about everything feel good and right again. I tried at things that I normally didn’t care about.” 

Finally, Tony dragged his gaze back towards Steve, and something tugged viciously at the super soldier’s chest when their eyes locked. “You’ll know when you’re in love, Cap,” he stated quietly, something painful darkening his eyes to hickory. “It’s the best and the worst feeling in the world.”

For his part, Steve felt like he’d been sucker punched, and it wasn’t because Tony’s answer had been so truthfully raw. It was because he’d spent the better part of a chunk of time in love with his best friend without even knowing it. 

Everything was better when Tony was around; that was just a point of fact for Steve, a ready given. And on the field? When everything went to shit around him and Steve had no idea what to do or how to do it? Tony was the one he looked for. Looked towards. If he had Iron Man in his sights, then he knew it wasn’t as bad as he thought, because Tony was there and everything would work out, somehow. 

And his smile? God, Tony’s smile lit up every inch of a darkened space. Steve did whatever he could on a consistent basis, just so that he could have that smile as a part of his day. Whether it was lounging on the couch in Tony’s workshop, or bringing him lunch when he forgot to eat, or listening to him even though Steve only understood about half the words, he did it all, because the only thing better than Tony’s smile was his laugh, and on the best days, Steve got to hear that, too. 

As for trying at the things that he didn’t care about before; well, that encompassed just about everything, didn’t it? For the longest time, Steve had had trouble putting his energy and passion into anything because of how heart-wrenching it had been to lose all those years. To move on from friends and loved ones already passed, knowing that they’d mourned him long decades ago. The weight of that grief and guilt had been like a living thing, sucking the soul out of him one dreary hour at a time. But then Tony had blasted into his life like a meteor and nothing was as dull anymore, and gradually, Steve found himself caring about the little things again. Trying again. Living again. It had given him a life, again.

The best and the worst feeling in the world… that sounded about right. Only Steve hadn’t known, not when he’d been close to broken at the sight of an injured Iron Man, or when he’d been metaphorically knocked off his feet by a tuxedo-clad Tony Stark. 

Not even when he’d had his world shattered by the confirmation that Tony had felt the same, had Steve realized that he’d been in love all along. 

_“Steve Rogers, not noticin’ love. Big shocker there.”_

Bucky, the little jerk, had known. Why the hell hadn’t he said something? 

“Tony Stark, as I live and breathe.”

Steve halted his internal monologue of cussing out his oldest friend, shifting into a slightly defensive stance as he turned with Tony towards the new voice. Blue eyes narrowed as Steve locked on to a man who was about his height, muscled and toned and a little rough looking with his leather jacket and ripped jeans and close-cropped black hair. Green eyes that looked almost emerald danced with happiness as the man looked upon Tony, and it immediately put Steve’s back up. 

Tony seemed to have no such reservation. “Ryan Coleman.” The genius laughed, happy and unrestrained in a way that was usually reserved for Steve. “Well, fuck me. Of all the sidewalks on all the streets in all the world.”

“Here’s lookin’ at you, kid,” the guy grinned, and Steve got the aggravating feeling that he was missing a reference. That concern took a backseat as Tony moved forward without hesitation and brought the man into a hug. A hug that was way too long and familiar for Steve to be happy with. “Now, I’ve got the excuse of working a case, but why are you slumming the streets of New York at 3:30 in the morning?”

Tony pulled away a split second before Steve could physically pull him back, which was probably for the best, but the super soldier’s luck ended there. “On the hunt for ice-cream,” he answered, as though it should have been obvious, grinning as he looked over the other man. “It’s been years, Ry,” the brunet commented, sounding like he was lamenting the time that stood between then and now. Then, almost as an afterthought, Tony shifted to put Steve a little more in his line of focus. “Let me introduce you. This is my buddy, Steve Rogers.”

“Captain America needs no introduction,” the guy – Ryan – smiled amicably enough, offering a hand that Steve really didn’t want to take, unsure as he was that he wouldn’t crush a tiny bone or two. By mistake, obviously. He was really strong. Stronger than this guy, anyway. “Ryan Coleman, but everyone calls me Cole.”

Not Tony, Steve wanted to point out childishly, but he held back both impulses and forced a smile as he shook the man’s hand. “Nice to meet you, Cole.” Not. “You an old friend of Tony’s?”

“Old flame, I think, would be the more accurate description,” Coleman grinned as he playfully leered at Tony. It raised Steve’s hackles, but there was nothing much he could do about it since Tony, the traitor, was laughing about it. “We used to go out, back when I was a rookie and worked reasonable hours, and this one wasn’t moonlighting as a superhero.”

Tony rolled his eyes slightly, but there was a hint of pleasure evident in his eyes at the undertone of approval in the words. Why did this guy’s endorsement mean anything to him, anyway? The past was in the stupid past, and it needed to stay there as far as Steve was concerned. 

Oblivious to Steve’s mounting displeasure, Tony’s eyes were affixed to Coleman. “I heard you got the bump to LT not too long ago,” he said, pride lifting his voice as well. “I remember when all you wanted was to get your detective’s badge. You’ve come a long way, Ry.”

“We both have,” Cole acknowledged. “Just… not the way we thought we would.” 

Tony shrugged, but it was a motion that was forced to look casual. “We were kids. What did we know?”

Steve was struck with the notion that he was completely absent from whatever moment the two men seemed to be having. They looked at each other like they were having their own, silent conversation, and it hit the back of his throat like spoiled milk because he wasn’t used to not having at least a fraction of Tony’s attention. Especially not on these nights; these nights that were meant to be his and his alone. 

He’d never been particularly good at sharing, but Steve didn’t care much about that. He had no intentions of sharing Tony, especially not now that he’d finally figured out that the genius was his. 

Now, just for Coleman to get the memo. 

“I always knew what I wanted,” the man stated almost arrogantly, and Steve had to resist the impulse to pull Tony behind him when Cole stepped closer. “I still do, actually. What are you doing tomorrow night?”

Oh, fuck no. 

Steve started to speak, determined to remind them of his presence, but before he could, Tony beat him to the punch. “That depends,” the inventor grinned, and Steve almost swallowed his tongue. “You gonna take me back to that God-awful Thai place with th-…”

“I was thinking more along the lines of that little French bistro you liked, but Jesus, you’re never gonna let me live that one down, are you?” Cole laughed, fondness lighting up his eyes. He looked at Tony in the way that a lover would; with affection, lust, and a little bit of secrecy.

They had something between them that Steve didn’t have claim to; history. Could he even begin to compete with that? 

“You’re on,” Tony agreed, some of that softness in his eyes that was usually directed at Steve alone. 

And broke his heart the way that Steve must have broken his. 

###

Steve had known torture in his life, but this was a cruel and unusual form of it. 

Tony had gone on his stupid date; and came back looking happier and more content than he looked around anyone other than Steve. 

Then there were the flowers the next day. 

That wasn’t even the right thing to do! Anyone who actually knew Tony, would have known that sending him flowers was ridiculous and clichéd and juvenile, and the real way to his heart would have been something a little less conventional. Steve? He would have gone with sending the genius a bag of his favourite coffee beans, for example. Tony loved the stuff, practically lived on it most days, and it was a personal touch that said a whole lot more than stupid flowers. 

Unfortunately, that little stunt hadn’t been enough for Tony to kick the has-been to the curb. Two days later had taken the pair to a fancy dinner at some Greek place, followed by 80s night at a club. 

Yet another mistake. Steve happened to know that Tony’s favourite food was authentic Italian, because it reminded him of the few times as a child that Maria Stark would cook, often letting a young Tony ‘help’ her. It formed a good memory for him, one of precious few, so if it was _Steve_ taking his love out for a romantic dinner, he would have taken Tony to this little Mom-and-Pop Italian joint that served the best homemade carbonara in the state, hands down. Tony had also told him once, during one of their deep and intimate conversations, that he was far over the clubbing scene, with all its pumping music and sweaty anonymity, so _Steve_ would have followed up his date with a quiet night on the roof of the tower, with lit candles and softly playing music so that they could have their first dance underneath the stars. 

But still, not even that had been enough to show Tony that he was with someone who didn’t know him at all, and even now, the genius was out with _Ryan Call-me-Cole Coleman,_ to watch that new mindless action movie that had no plot and even less suspense. 

Now, _Steve_ on the other hand, would have taken Tony to a drive-thru that was showing the Hannibal Lecter trilogy. It was a classic, and one of the few movies that the genius rewatched because it was suspenseful enough to keep him entertained, and not so filled with technical knowledge that Tony had trouble turning his brain off with it. Plus, it would have had the added advantage of holding the genius close in the privacy of the car…

Steve had known torture in his life. But this was a cruel and unusual form of it. 

###

“You go any harder, you’re gonna split your knuckles.”

Steve paused for a beat, slightly startled by the sound of Tony’s voice, before pointedly slamming his fist into the punching bag again. And then grunting, more out of irritation than pain, when his knuckles split under the pressure.

Tony sighed, a cavernous and wretched sound that reached across the expanse of gym between them and punched into Steve’s gut. He hated hearing his genius sound like that; hated it even more than he hated the fact that he’d lost the one he loved because once again, he’d been too slow to act, too slow to make a move and take what he wanted. What had been his to take, if he’d just been quick enough, brave enough, strong enough. 

Footsteps echoed in the otherwise empty room as Tony crossed the distance between them. Without a word, the brunet took him by the wrist and led him to a nearby weight machine, directing him to sit on the padded bench. Steve sat without argument and watched with dull blue eyes as Tony fetched a first aid kit and came back to sit across from him, astride the opposite end of the weight bench. 

He whistled, low and sympathetic, when he unwrapped the tape and caught sight of the bruised mess that was Steve’s knuckles. “Really did a number on yourself here, Captain,” he commented quietly, those clever and nimble fingers translating well into caretaker as he soaked a cotton ball in anti-septic and gently swiped it over the cuts. He blew across it lightly, a tender act meant to ease the sting, and it worked as intended; soothing both the sting of the alcohol and the sting to Steve’s pride that had been festering since that night. “The healing factor’s already kicking in,” Tony added, as if reassurance about his knuckles was what Steve needed. “You probably won’t even need it, but I’m gonna wrap it anyway…”

“Why are you here?” Steve interjected wearily, cutting off Tony’s concerned words. He knew that he had no right whatsoever to be angry or jealous or upset – Bucky had been all too quick to point that out to him a week ago – but he just couldn’t help it. Tony was _over him_ and it was supposed to make everything okay again, but instead, it had just ruined everything, because Tony might have moved on from him but Steve certainly wasn’t ready to let the genius go. It wasn’t fair, he hadn’t even had the chance to have something to move on from! And yeah, maybe he only had himself to blame, and he was, but this… Tony caring for him and loving him even though he was no longer _in love_ with him, that was just. Way too painful for him to handle. 

Tony winced at his question and raised ravaged hazel eyes to his. “Bucky called me. Told me that you had a bit of a blow up at the team, and…”

“And what?” Steve asked harshly, helpless to soften his tone even knowing that his target was undeserving of his ire. “He told you that you needed to calm the savage beast?”

Tony wouldn’t have been Tony if he didn’t rise to the bait of Steve’s ill-directed temper, and true to form, the brunet raised a cool eyebrow and pulled the bandage around his knuckles a little tighter before answering in a clipped voice. “He told me you needed me.”

The words took all the hot wind from Steve’s sails. He slumped slightly in place and without his anger as a buffer, the pain and hurt and regret steamrolled him all at once. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologized softly, sounding dejected even to his own ears. “I’m sorry, I didn’t… I was outta line, I just…”

“Hey, c’mon.” Tony softened just as quickly, leaning closer and cupping a hand around his neck. The contact was like a hot brand on Steve’s already heated skin, and he relished it even as his genius gently nudged him upwards so that they were face to face. “I’m gonna ask you this one more time, because you still haven’t given me a real answer. What’s going on with you, Steve?”

Eavesdropping on Tony’s conversation had been wrong, but he couldn’t keep making things worse by pretending that he hadn’t heard what he’d heard. “Why are you over me?”

Well. That probably explained everything in a very concise and succinct way. 

“What?” Tony asked, perplexed, looking like those were the last words he’d expected to come out of Steve’s mouth. Which probably wasn’t entirely off-base. “Steve, I… what are you talking about?”

“Rhodes,” the super soldier explained miserably, leaning almost desperately into the contact of Tony’s hand against his neck. “I heard you talking to him last week. You told him you were over me. Why? And why didn’t you tell me about it?”

Tony looked flabbergasted and a little pale, and when he made to move his hand away, Steve just caught it in his own instead. Intertwined their fingers like he was never going to let go. Hoping that he could say something, anything, so he wouldn’t have to. 

“I don’t…” Tony tried, and abruptly clamped his lips shut again, shaking his head as if he were trying to solve a complicated math equation. Come to it, that might have been easier for the genius to do. “I didn’t want you to know and feel guilty for not returning my feelings. I was happy just being your best friend, if that was all I could get.”

Steve knew it was wrong, but he had to try to convince Tony that there was something more; something real between them that just wasn’t with stupid, Tony-ignorant Coleman. 

Using the hand in his, the super soldier gently tugged Tony closer, thrilling to himself when the genius came easily. “It isn’t,” he replied earnestly, voice hushed with the force of his repressed emotions and feelings of the past week. He raised his free hand; cupped his Tony’s jaw. “And I do return your feelings. I’m _in love_ with you. I was an idiot and I didn’t see it, I _couldn’t_ see it, but I do now, and… and I know you’re with Coleman, I do, but sweetheart you can’t just tell me that what we have is nothing anymore. I’m not over you, I’m never going to stop loving you, and I can only hope that you haven’t really stopped loving me, because we’re once in a lifetime, Tony. You’re my once in a lifetime.”

Tony’s eyes were wide and a little glazed, and Steve wasn’t entirely sure that either of them was breathing anymore, but after a long moment suspended in time, the brunet exhaled shakily. 

“I’m not with Ryan,” he said, somewhat weakly, as if it were the only words he could manage. Steve blinked in confusion, both at the words themselves, and its apparent meaning. Without prompting, Tony elaborated. “Coleman and I aren’t dating.”

Impassioned speech taking a backseat in light of the (amazing, fantastic, wonderful) development, Steve croaked unsteadily. “You’re not?”

“Nope,” Tony shook his head, still sounding like he was battling for his legendary composure as he tried to explain. “Ryan… he was the first person that I ever loved.”

Steve cringed, but took comfort from the way Tony squeezed his hand, and laid his free palm over Steve’s, where it still spanned his jaw. “Person,” he repeated dully. Not man or woman, but person, in general. 

“Yes,” the brunet nodded firmly, but the softness in his eyes forced Steve to hold on to hope. “We were young, and we had plans and ideas for the future, and it was new and shiny and everything I’d never had before in my life. And then reality kicked in, and we ended up taking a different path to the one we initially thought we would. I remember when that happened, Steve. I remember why we broke up, and I’m a genius, if you’ll care to recall.” Tony made his voice dry, and Steve was helpless against the quirk of his lips. “I don’t make a habit of repeating my mistakes, at least not with the same person. This past week was just a way to say goodbye one more time,” he finished, brown eyes sincere and open in a way that held no space for half-truths. 

So. They weren’t dating, and judging from Tony’s hands in his, the genius wasn’t as over Steve as he claimed to be. That, the blond translated, meant he wasn’t too late. He hadn’t missed his shot and there was still a chance to claim what was rightfully his. His, and not meant for anyone else. 

Slow as he was being to process, Tony pulled back slightly, a wary look on his face that Steve hated himself for putting there, and vowed to spend a lifetime making sure it wasn’t there again. “Are you… is that… does it change anything?” the brunet asked haltingly. “That I’m not taken? Do you still…”

Steve cut him off one more time, claiming his lips in a deep and possessive kiss that bypassed sparks and went straight into a raging inferno. He didn’t let go of Tony’s hand, but he did move his other hand from the genius’ jaw, to all the way around his waist. He pulled his love in close and tight, gripping Tony’s hip like he wanted to leave an imprint of his hand there. 

Not entirely false. 

Tony was no passive participant, and as he swiped a thumb against the spot just underneath Steve’s ear, the super soldier groaned, standing up in a quick motion and pulling Tony with him. Ceaselessly sexy, the genius instinctively wrapped his legs around Steve’s waist, and they could only hope that none of the team was hoping to use the gym today because they certainly weren’t going to make it to a bed. 

“I love you,” Steve told Tony hoarsely, feeling like he needed to say it again and again for all the missed opportunities and all the times when he’d foolishly left Tony thinking otherwise. “I love you, baby, I’m so sorry fo-…”

“Shut up, Steve,” Tony mumbled into his mouth, kissing the apology away, eyes tellingly damp as he trembled slightly in Steve’s arms. “You got me, now.”

Steve nodded as much as he could while kissing his genius. “I got you. Mine,” he growled after the – third? Fifth? – kiss, palming Tony’s ass possessively as he attempted to make it very clear who the man belonged to. “You’re mine, Tony, ain’t sharin’. Nobody gets to be with ya, only mine…”

“Long as it goes both ways, soldier boy,” Tony replied breathlessly, rocking into him teasingly as Steve stumbled towards the showers. 

“Promise.” Steve felt like the word was ripped from the depths of his soul, for how much it resonated with him. Tony was his, and he was Tony’s. It was a truth that he should have seen a long time ago, and a truth that he’d nearly lost forever. The thought tore at him. “I promise, Tony.”

Likely hearing the change in his voice, Tony dipped his head, this time simply touching his forehead to Steve’s. For a second, they stayed like that, suspended in an existence that was theirs alone. 

“You make the good things become great and the bad things seem not so terrible anymore, Steve,” Tony murmured, and maybe it wasn’t explicitly those words, but Steve heard them loud and clear anyway, filling his heart with indescribable happiness. 

_I love you, too._


End file.
